My Inspiration

This year I want to make my life into something I would be envious of right now.
This was my face book status at the beginning of the year.
My favorite response to this post was from my friend Philip, "that reminds me of a comment one judge made on Project Accessory about a girl who was her own muse: "She designs pieces for the woman she aspires to be." I love that idea of goals related to our best selves instead of someone else."
This year is about progression. 
And here I am at the end of January... so how is it all going?
I am buying my own place! It is so surreal! I never realized how much paperwork becoming a homeowner would entail, it just doesn't seem real. But I am excited, it is less than 10 minutes to work and I feel great about my decision.

I also have become a bit of a calorie nazi... I have an app on my phone called Lose It and it is so cool! You can scan the barcode of food items and it will upload all the nutritional information. You can input a recipe and it will figure out the calories per serving. If you have a smartphone, I highly recommend it!

I also have a little tool called a fitbit, it's like a pedometer on steroids! I absolutely love it! And unlike the bodybugg, no one can tell I am wearing it. If you are interested... head over to www.fitbit.com


So... I have lost 8 lbs! And starting to work on my training for the half marathon next year!

I was also thinking about myself as a child- what dreams did she have? Would she be happy with how things are now? I look at her innocence, her smile, her future full of possibilities... What would she become?

I think she'd be pretty happy. I know I am.

All this hype?

So, I like to watch shows on TV. My new favorite show this season is "Once Upon a Time" on ABC. It is interesting, pretty clean and engaging.

It takes elements of storytelling that I love. It is based on familiar fairy tales with a new twist and I am very interested to see where the story will lead.

Another show I have been very excited about is the upcoming NBC show, "Smash".

It tells the story of what goes on behind the scenes to get a show to Broadway. Being a Theatre buff and a person who is keenly interested in the whole production process, I have been greatly anticipating its' debut. And NBC is betting a lot on this show. Promos for it have been everywhere for months and months, with the official TV debut being the day after the Superbowl. (Ironic?) Also, they have pre-released the pilot online and through Comcast on demand starting... Today!
So this morning, still in my pajamas, I watched it...

Eh?

Pretty disappointed...

I hope it gets better.

And I like the idea of Katherine McPhee as a Pop singer, but Broadway?? C'mon...

Eh...

At least I still have "Once Upon a Time".

Forgiveness

 I must be cruel, only to be kind: Thus bad begins and worse remains behind. 

-Hamlet Act III Scene IV

In my intermediate Theatre class we have been studying Shakespeare and most recently, Hamlet. A big portion of our study was the theme of revenge and the effects of revenge throughout the story. Also, we discussed the opposite scenario dealing with forgiveness. As I was grading their final quiz, I found these questions to be particularly thought-provoking- (I am summarizing here)-
Put yourself in Hamlet's shoes... do you think he was justified in his actions?... Do you think Hamlet should have forgiven his Uncle?... What do you think the outcome would have been in Hamlet focused on forgiveness rather than revenge?...
Their responses were fascinating. Some people felt like Hamlet was justified and they too would have resorted to the same actions if put in the same situation. Some felt like Hamlet should have found a way to forgive his Uncle. Some felt mixed feelings about Hamlet's situation. Another interesting observation was that those students who are openly religious were more likely to express the need for Hamlet to forgive the situation...
Yes, Hamlet's case is extreme (I mean how many of us have an Uncle who murders our Father and marries our Mother?...) But, studying the play brought about an interesting discussion on the power of forgiveness and the poison of revenge. And yet sometimes, we as human beings spend so much time holding onto grudges and negative feelings, when it is much sweeter to forgive.
One of my favorite songs is from the Broadway musical, Jane Eyre, entitled, "Forgiveness"

You mustn't be revengeful
You have to be strong
To offer good for evil
Return right for wrong
We must not hold a grudge
And we must learn to endure
Then as God is your judge
At least your heart will be pure
Forgiveness
Is the mightiest sword
Forgiveness of those you hate
Will be your highest reward
When they bruise you with words
When they make you feel small
When it's hardest to bear
You must do nothing at all
Forgiveness
Is the simplest vow
Forgiveness
Of all their crimes
Is your deliverance now
Bless those souls
Who would curse your name
When the last bell tolls
You'll be free of blame
You can continue to grieve
But know the Gospel is true
You must forgive those who lie
And bless them that curse you
Forgiveness
Is the mightiest sword
Forgiveness of those you hate
Will be your highest reward
The time will come when we will leave this world,
and then the injustice and the pain and the sin will fall away from us,
and only the spark of the spirit will remain - returning to God who created it
You must never lose faith
You must never lose heart
God will restore your trust
And I know you're afraid
I'm as scared as you are
But willing to be brave
Brave enough for love 

Forgiveness is probably the most powerful thing we can ever do in this life. Just my random thought for the evening. By the way, the new David Tennant version  of Hamlet is awesome and probably my favorite film adaptation of the work. Even my students found it interesting and engaging! YAY!

My Mom is Awesome!

My Mom is amazing for many, many reasons...

Here are two- the gifts she gave me for my birthday...

Happy 33rd!

Today is my 33rd birthday. If you would've asked me 10 years ago where I would be now- I don't think I would've imagined where I would end up today.
I've has lots of disappointments, multiple heartbreaks, many wonderful moments and endless joy!
What have I learned in my 33 years?
You really do determine your own happiness and it truly is a choice to be happy. Life is craptacular. (It's so spectacularly crappy!) And at any given moment, there are good and bad sides to every situation. Where do we place our focus? We may not be able to control what happens in life, but we can control how we look at things. And, yes, I am far from perfect at doing this, but I try. I try to learn from every situation, to forgive, and to see things from a perspective other than my own.
I've learned to let go. When I was younger I lived with a lot of fear. A fear of adandoment, of failure, of loneliness, of having a broken heart, of missed opportunities, of shattered dreams... And guess what- I've experienced most of those things and I am still alive. The sun still shines, and a new day always dawns. Holding onto things always seems to suffocate the thing you hold most dear. So, learn to let go and forgive.
I've learned that I need my faith and the gospel now more than ever. There have been times when I've felt like there was no way I would receive the promised blessings... so why even try anymore. Then, in His loving way, I am reminded of what is really important. That no matter how much I learn and how old I become, I will never outgrow my need for the gospel and my place as a daughter of God.
I've learned to be grateful for what I have.
I've learned that no matter how many times you are hurt, you must NEVER stop loving others.
Because, without love, what's the purpose?

Happy 33rd birthday to me!

Feeling pretty optimistic

Ah, the New Year. The promise of change, of growth, of new opportunities. I found it interesting that a lot of people posted on face book how 2011 was a hard year and they were glad that it was over. So, it got me thinking about my 2011...
I started the New Year celebrating my nephew's first birthday.

Then back to the rigors of teaching- With Amy and some students at the Utah Theatre Conference in St. George. It was a ton of fun and I was so proud of my kids!

 The Nerd

 Night of One Acts

 Arsenic & Old Lace

 Into the Woods

 Into the Woods Set

At the year end Drama Awards.

I know I've said this numerous times but I truly am blessed to do what I do. The love that I receive from this kids is amazing. The fulfillment I get from my job is incredible.

Some other memorable events from 2011 were-

 Ivy's Baptism!

New York in April with the world famous Toasted Marshmallow Shake!

 I saw Natasha Bedingfield in concert with my BFF, Amy!

 I spent the late spring and early summer with my good friend Cameron, celebrating his birthday and randomly helping with the Murray Production of "Scarlet Pimpernel" were he played Percy-

And he met this lovely lady!

 Saying goodbye to my long locks...

 My daring 'do!

DISNEYWORLD!

And of course my fall musical "How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying."

So, even though 2011 was a pretty tough year in many respects, it was also an amazing time in my life and I am so grateful for the experiences that I had.

Now onto 2012... First of all, great news! I put an offer down on my own CONDO!! I pray I get it! It is super cute and would mean a less than 10 minute commute for me. And although I have enjoyed living in my current place, they are raising rent $200, which is just ridiculous! And the idea of owning my own place is so exciting.

Also, awhile back (ok so last summer) I wrote about my goal to do the Disney Marathon. Here is the update- It's still on! But I want to do the Disney Princess Half Marathon in February of 2013! I have about a year to train and so I will, I just have to keep focused and not let the doldrums get me down.

Overall, I am feeling very optimistic for 2012! I feel like great things are in store for me along with some grand adventures! Next Thursday I turn 33 years old, which is a little surreal, as each passing year seems to be. But, oh what a year it will be!